My life’s most significant journey has involved a wide road, two circles, a choice at a fork and a complete change of direction.
After leaving home at 19 in search of freedom and satisfaction, I chose to walk on a broad, well-populated trail. It started out feeling liberating, good and right. It led to turmoil and then despair. My chosen path had become an ever-descending spiral.
It was at that time that I was invited to various church events and concerts. Places I normally would never have been caught dead in! But to avoid offense I agreed to go. There the Word of God was spoken and sung. I kept a safe arm’s distance around me. Inwardly I mocked what seemed very naïve and Pollyanna-like.
Yet I couldn’t help but notice in the faces I saw, a different sort of people. Seemingly peaceful, joyful, full of life.
Back at my apartment resuming my usual modus operandi, I became more and more aware of the dichotomy between my life and what these people seemed to have found. I felt a growing conflict inside. Late one night, feeling completely tossed to and fro, I went out for a long walk around a lake.
Two Different Worlds
Ringing the lake in the dark of the night
Tug of war raging on in my heart,
The life I was living vs. lives I’d just seen
A battle of Light and of Dark
A conflict so fierce like a ripping inside
Would I trade all I knew for completely unknown?
I’d never before felt a splitting like this
Neither place that night feeling like home
One, familiar as skin but now stranger I felt
The other so polar to all of my self
As I couldn’t stride pond edge and path the same time
I could neither live both worlds
Then…Whole shift paradigm!
One night I surrendered my life and said “yes”
Narrow way I stepped on with my fears,
So uncertain inside yet a full turnaround
That has made all the difference these years
My baby step onto that narrow way has brought me the “abundant life” I had longed for. One day that path will lead me to my forever home with Him. All because of God’s great love!
May we “prepare Him room” in every part of our hearts. Savior Jesus, born to die for our sins, “Come in.”
“I have come that they may have life, and have it abundantly.” ~John 10:10
“Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter though it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.” ~Matthew 7:13 -14
Shared by Karen DiProspero
6 responses to “Two Different Worlds”
Through prose and poetry you describe your journey so full of truth, heart, and discovery. What a meaningful trail you found! Your ability to write about your walk and the Bible verses you used are stirring.
Thank you ever so much, Lynn. ❤️ The Lord Jesus came seeking me, even through all my pride and resistance. Even after all the wrong I had done, thought, said. (And He is still faithful to convict me, correct, forgive, restore and train me in righteousness.) I just can’t ever thank Him enough!
I’ve thought of you often…even had begun an email that has been stuck in the “draft pile.” Oh my 🙄
Basically, thank you for so warmly embracing and encouraging me, Lynn. You are a dear and will be missed next Tuesday (and in my prayers, I assure you. 🙏❤️)
May your heart be His Bethlehem. ❤️✝️💚 Christ’s blessings on you, Ted and all your family in special ways this Christmas!
I feel that the life path chosen is all too common though without the final insight that was lovingly written for us. So well expressed and hopeful!
I so appreciate your taking the time to share your thoughts and kind affirmation, Mary Ann. Thanks!
It was then and I also think now, an easy and popular path I initially chose. In looking back, such a mercy from the Lord to allow me to experience inner emptiness, frustration that I couldn’t control things like my feelings of jealousy/envy, intense insecurity, depression, futility, hopelessness, etc…And such love and grace from God to show me that surrendering control of my life to the Lord Jesus was the starting point of the new life I had longed for.
May your celebration of “Emmanuel, our God with us” be bright and beautiful. ❤️✝️💚
I especially appreciate the part about that time of not fitting into either world. A time and place of wrestling. A time and place of loneliness. And then the letting go of the one and the embracing of the other, followed by “The Great Welcome Home.”
Thank you, Glenn, for sharing your understanding of the internal conflict I experienced. It was a lonely time for me …but a necessary one. As long as I was “at home” with my old life, I could always find someone to party with and temporarily feel fine.
Not until I was in places where the Bible was taught and in the company of people who truly loved and lived for Jesus, did I even become aware that there was this whole different world. Another option to consider, to wrestle with, as you put it. And thus, a choice.
I’ve had people say, “I wish I could believe as you do, but I just can’t.” My best counsel to them would be to place yourself under the teaching of the Word of God, or to thoughtfully, prayerfully read it for yourself.
Inviting Jesus to come into my heart and make me His own truly was the very best “Welcome Home!”
Thanks again, and blessings on you and your family as you journey through Advent to Christmas this year.